sam_storyteller: (Default)
sam_storyteller ([personal profile] sam_storyteller) wrote2005-07-03 02:54 pm

LORD PETER: Investigating; PG-13. Peter/Charles.

Warnings: None.
Summary: When Charles arrests Peter in an...unfortunate nightclub, he wants an explanation.

Originally posted 9/2005(?)

Now available at AO3!

Part of the Wimsey of Ficlets podfic anthology by the lovely [ profile] blueyeti!


"Tell me you were investigating, and I'll believe you."

Peter, seated in an uncomfortable interrogation-room chair and pressing a bit of ice wrapped in a handkerchief to his forehead, reflected briefly upon the advantage of being good friends with the police.

"You're drunk," Charles Parker said.

"Only a little," Peter replied, "And not enough to have me arrested for disorderly conduct."

"Peter," Charles sighed, sitting across the table. "Listen, I've stuck out my neck for you. I got your name off the arrests list, didn't I? Didn't I find you a quiet private place to lick your wounds?"

"The irony of the phraseology is not lost on me, Parker-bird," Peter replied. Parker couldn't help but grin.

"All right, then. Tell me you were investigating."

Peter set the handkerchief down. There was a nasty bruise on his forehead, but no bleeding. "Out of curiousity, Charles, what would you do if I said I wasn't?"

Parker rubbed his eyes. "You're not the first nobleman ever to get caught in a night-club with morally ambiguous staff, Peter."

"No, just one of the few to be caught slipping out the back of this particular club into the waiting arms of the constabulary. I don't believe the peerage has ever graced a nightclub for homosexuals before, have they? Not publicly, not since poor old Wilde," Peter said.

"Listen, everyone knows you put your overlarge proboscis in where you have no personal interest -- "

"It is rather prominent," Peter sighed. "I reiterate my inquiry, Charles. Out of idle curiousity, say. What would be done?"

"You'd be imprisoned for the night and arraigned on charges of unlawful solicitation and sodomy."

"My goodness. I had better be investigating then, hadn't I?"

They watched each other for a few minutes; it was unusual for Parker to be so wary of his friend, even though his incomprehension was not unheard-of.

"There are certain...requirements I have, for a balanced and healthy life," Peter said quietly. "Requirements unfulfilled by Viennese singers and Parisian actresses. You don't like many parts of the world I travel in, and that's all right; but know that I was there as an escort to someone of considerably higher standing than a serving-boy to be bought for a few coins. He, however, seems to have escaped your clutches."


"If I tell you, are you going to arrest him for sodomy?" Peter asked, with a quirk of the lips. "Even you would not chase after royalty in such a tactless fashion, Charles."

Parker's eyes blazed. "I'd arrest who I had to -- "

"Oh?" Peter asked, delicately.

"If he took you to a place like that, Peter, he's no safe company for you, whatever his rank."

Peter leaned back, one eyebrow rising. "You sound almost jealous, Charles."

Parker opened his mouth, then shut it again.

"I'll take you to my flat for the night," he said gruffly.

"Will you, now," Peter asked, in a low voice.

"If you're caught at that club again, I can't promise to protect you."

"Believe me, having experienced such an arrest once is quite enough deterrence. Well done; the Police Prevent Crime."

Parker grumbled as he found his coat and hat. They hailed a late-night cab outside the police station, and sat in more-or-less companionable silence, Peter pale and grave, Charles businesslike and brisk, until they reached his flat.

"Would you really arrest a prince for homosexuality, Charles?" Peter asked.

"It's my duty to uphold the law, not just bits of it," Parker answered, lighting the lamps in the sitting room.

"Do you approve of the laws?"

"I do not, but it's not my job to make them," he replied.

"But you do think they're wrong?"

Charles shrugged out of his coat, and Peter struggled out of his own. "I don't see what business of mine it is where a man puts his....nose," he finished with a grin, and Peter laughed.

"You don't object to it in any way?"

The police detective fixed his friend with a curious look. "You're my friend, Peter."

"And if I weren't your friend?"

"You wouldn't be kipping on my couch."

"You're avoiding my carefully put questions. I'm offended."

"Are you hungry?"

"Yes," Peter said, and hooked two fingers in the collar of his shirt, and kissed him.
ngaio: (Default)

[personal profile] ngaio 2005-09-28 03:55 pm (UTC)(link)
I loved this when I read it the first time, and the second, and this time too. I would love it even more if you wrote more Peter/Charles because there just isn't enough out there.
ext_80328: Mad Martha (Book Carrier)

[identity profile] 2005-09-28 04:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, this certainly puts an entirely new slant on Lady Mary's pyjamas! Clearly she has nothing to worry about.
ext_1059: (Default)

[identity profile] 2005-09-28 05:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Aaaaahhhh, I just love any of your Lord Peter stuff. But does this rate as Peter/Charles, or as Peter/PoW?

[identity profile] 2005-09-29 04:05 pm (UTC)(link)
ROFL! I suppose it could be Peter/Prince of Wales, though he really only says "prince" -- it could be some Austrian prince or something :D

[identity profile] 2005-09-28 06:07 pm (UTC)(link)

I've certainly thought of Peter/Bunter, but I can honestly say that Peter/Charles never occured to me. This was very, very well done.

[identity profile] 2005-09-29 04:04 pm (UTC)(link)
See, from the start I always saw Peter/Charles more -- they're more equal in each others' eyes, whereas Bunter never forgets his place and neither does Peter :D

[identity profile] 2005-09-29 10:59 am (UTC)(link)
So poor Harriet is just a clever cover then?

I've never thought of Peter/Charles before, but now that you introduced me t the idea, I quite like it.


[identity profile] 2005-09-29 04:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, there's no reason Peter can't be bisexual. Clearly he loves women and loves loving's just that he needs more for a "balanced" life. :D

[identity profile] 2008-07-21 03:27 pm (UTC)(link)
exactly. I've always maintained (after the Harriet arc - and especially after Busman's Honeymoon) that Peter/Harriet/Bunter were a beautifully balanced triad with HARRIET being the one that "added in". She takes great care to make sure that Bunter is accepting of her AND to make sure that everyone knows that she has NO INTENTION of asking Bunter to leave Peter.

but then... i've been accused (many times) of seeing the world through Polyamourous and Bisexual lenses... ::shrug::

And honestly, i could SEE Peter/Charles... at least until Harriet and Polly come into the picture (because both Peter and Charles are too much the gentlemen to "poach" on another's claimed territory.) And Peter loves his sister too much to deny her Charles' love... and cares for Charles too much to make him choose between two Wimseys.

just my take though.

Beautiful story.

the kendermouse

[identity profile] 2005-11-27 09:32 pm (UTC)(link)
I knew I'd seen this fic somewhere! The idea has sort of been itching away at the back of my brain for a while, but I wasn't sure if I'd actually read it or if was something I'd dreamed about after having read too much Whimsey one night. I'm very glad I foud it again. *grins*

[identity profile] 2005-12-28 10:21 am (UTC)(link)

[identity profile] 2006-01-09 07:03 am (UTC)(link)
Dear Lord, I'm so glad I'm in a position to understand your Wimsey fics now. They're so utterly delightful.

But, sadly, there aren't enough of them. Since it wouldn't be very nice to beg you for more, I'll ask: Can you suggest any other Wimsey fan authors, or, even better, slashers?

[identity profile] 2006-01-11 05:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh lord, I don't read much Wimseyfic so I'd be hard pressed. [ profile] adina_atl wrote a lovely crossover with Wimsey and Wooster, which you can understand even if you haven't read Chesterton:

(that's the end, but it has links to the other three chapters).

Other than that I can't think of any Wimsey writers off the top of my head. We're a really tiny group in general. DLS is a hard author to fic :D

[identity profile] 2006-02-19 02:22 am (UTC)(link)
Ooooh! Very very nicey. LPW is one of the few people I'd never slash (he and Harriet are just so _sweet_!) but this was so lovelily done! Ooooh....... _lovin'_ your stuff, wish there was more LPW fanfic about, but if what there is is of this quiality there's nothing to complain about...!

[identity profile] 2006-03-04 03:30 am (UTC)(link)
Love. This.

[identity profile] 2006-05-07 02:16 pm (UTC)(link)
This. is. JOY.


[identity profile] 2006-07-29 11:17 pm (UTC)(link)
The world needs more Peter/Charles slash. Wow. Up until right now, I'd have sworn it was a pairing not found but in my head. Which reminds me - if you ever write/find more, would you please, please tell me about it?!

[identity profile] 2006-08-05 02:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it. I don't read much fanfic, but if I write any more it will be posted on the journal, no fear! :D

utterly wonderful

[identity profile] 2009-04-10 09:52 pm (UTC)(link)
I love charles' indignation over the unnamed prince taking Peter somewhere unsafe. A wonderful story (wie immer). Thanks for sharing

[identity profile] 2009-08-26 04:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Sam, this is good, but can you please tell me what the story is based off of and the author? Please. It has made me curious.

btw I'm now hooked on Ouran Host Club. I can't tell if you're a good influence or bad. Heehee.

[identity profile] 2009-08-26 04:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh! Yes, this is the Lord Peter Wimsey detective novels. They're by Dorothy Sayers; you can find a list of them by googling Lord Peter Wimsey Bibliography, most likely. They're fantastic :)

Interpersonal relationships

(Anonymous) 2014-04-16 10:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Why is it that many of the would-be Dorothy L Sayers, who post their sometimes puerile attempts at stories on this, and other sites, feel compelled to introduce an element of homoseuality into their posts?

I find them wholly implausible, and also offensive. There is no hint of it in the DLS canon. Indeed, if you read the Paul Austin Delagardie bigraphical notes appended to many of her books, you will see that his disreputable uncle trained him in the ways of handling a mistress.

The world before 1914 was very different from the world now, and that is when Wimsey was growing up. I recommend thet you read Dornford Yates' novel "Lower than Vermin". This depicts the decline of a noble house between the 1890's and the early fifties of the twentieth century. The title derives from an inflammatory speech made by Aneurin Bevan, in the forties.